Among the most common writing mistakes students make is the failure to use enough details. Here is one way to coax more details from students.
First, make sure students know what we mean by details. Details include
- Proper nouns
- Dates, days, months, years, seasons
- Direct quotes
- The thoughts of a person or character
- Figures of speech
- Sensory information—sights, sounds, and tastes
- Examples—maybe the most important detail
Next, rewrite a sentence the student has already written, such as, “I was late for the bus.” You can use any sentence, but if you use one of the student’s own sentences, the changes you make have more impact.
Now, you add a detail to the sentence, such as, “Yesterday, I was late for the bus.”
Now it is the student’s turn to add a detail to the same sentence. She writes, “Yesterday, I was late for the school bus.”
Now it is your turn again. “Yesterday, the first day of school, I was late for the school bus.”
Student’s turn. “Yesterday, the first day of school, I was five minutes late tardy for the school bus.”
At this point, you might like to choose another sentence and repeat the exercise.
This kind of work can increase vocabulary too. “My docile cat became aggressive when a stealthy bat flew out from the lofty peak of the municipal building.”